Philemon 13–14 (ESV)
I would have been glad to keep him with me, in order that he might serve me on your behalf during my imprisonment for the gospel, [14] but I preferred to do nothing without your consent in order that your goodness might not be by compulsion but of your own accord.
I love this sincere honesty that comes from Paul as he writes to Philemon. He has a desire to have Onesimus stay with him as a faithful servant because not only is Onesimus helpful and faithful to him, but there is a heart connection with him. Paul sees his usefulness during this imprisonment on both a physical and heart level. There is some emotional connection there. So even though he desires to keep Onesimus with him to help in his time of need, he knows that the proper action is to send him back to Philemon, who Onesimus is a bondservant. Even though Paul can justify this action in his mind and to others, he doesn’t want to compel Philemon to be backed into a corner where he doesn’t really have any option but to do as Paul requires. Paul takes the position of not compelling Philemon to do as he asked, but to appeal to Philemon to give freely toward the need Paul has during his imprisonment.
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