Tag: Heart

Seek and Find

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But from there you will seek the LORD your God and you will find him, if you search after him with all your heart and with all your soul.

Deuteronomy 4:29 (ESV)

This is a wonderful promise that I needed to hear this day. The promise that a heart that is seeking the Lord will surely find Him. There is often a notion that God is hidden from us and that we can never truly see and know him. That our own sinfulness keeps God at a distance and prevents us from finding him and knowing him. That may be true in the sense that our sin will keep us from seeking him with all our hearts and all our soul, but it is not true that we must do something about our sin first before we seek the Lord. Jesus calls us to come to him with our heavy ladens of burden and worry. He calls us to come to him. He wants to be found. He wants us to search after him with all our heart and soul when we are at our very best and when we are at our very worst. I don’t have to clean myself up first and then seek the Lord. No… I can and should seek the Lord with all my heart and all my soul in every moment of my life. When sin has me beaten down, this is when I should seek Jesus all the more. The only condition is that I seek him with everything I have, both heart and soul.

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Loathe to Praise

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And the people spoke against God and against Moses, “Why have you brought us up out of Egypt to die in the wilderness? For there is no food and no water, and we loathe this worthless food.”

Numbers 21:5 (ESV)

There are a lot of feelings and emotions within me that get stirred up by this singular verse. For the most part, when I hear this complaint from the people of Israel I can only hear my own voice yelling within me the same ungrateful response that is put to Moses. I often think that my complaining is harmless. I see nothing wrong with voicing my displeasure or distaste for a situation or circumstance that I may find myself. Yet, when I contemplate this complaint that the people have against Moses there are several elements of the verse that stand out to me. The people were speaking against God; the people questioned why they were rescued from slavery; the people were not satisfied with what God had provided for them in a miraculous way. This is me every day. I see and experience the grace and mercy of God in my life every day. My loving God gives me life and breathe, food and clothing, health and prosperity. But it is never enough for me. I want more. I want different. I want to find my happiness and joy in the things of this world. Thanksgiving and contentment are far removed from my heart at times.

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Look of Love

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And Jesus, looking at him, loved him, and said to him, “You lack one thing: go, sell all that you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.” 

Mark 10:21 (ESV)

This verse highlights a portion of a conversation that Jesus had with a rich young ruler in the Book of Mark. This particular story is of interest to me because it shows this man who seemingly had everything in this world that people desire. He was wealthy. He had influence and authority. He was diligent in his religious observations. On the outside, he was the picture of having it all together. Yet, he was missing something and he knew it. He knew that even with all these blessings his eternal salvation was not assured. So when Jesus came to his community, he was quick to come and kneel before him and ask him the most important question there is in life, “What must I do to inherit eternal life?” This rich young man and his quest looks awful similar to someone I know very well… me. And I dare say he looks like all of us.

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Aroma of Sacrifice

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And while he was at Bethany in the house of Simon the leper, as he was reclining at table, a woman came with an alabaster flask of ointment of pure nard, very costly, and she broke the flask and poured it over his head. 

Mark 14:3 (ESV)

What exactly does it mean to make a sacrifice to the Lord in the context of my life living in this modern world some 2,000 years after this passage in the Gospel of Mark was written? It has always been an interesting question for me to think about and ponder over the years. There are a lot of examples like this passage throughout the Bible, but there seems to be a single thread woven through all of them. That thread is the heart’s motivation and purpose behind the sacrifice being presented to Jesus. The focus seems to be less on what is given and the value of this sacrifice with an emphasis placed on bringing pure worship to our God. This is true in this passage as well. The people in the room wanted to make this about the costliness of the perfume and how many people could have been helped by selling it and distributing the funds. Jesus understands her motivation and confirms that this sacrifice of hers was to honor Him. It was such a beautiful sacrifice that her story is still being told and will continue to be told. 

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Not Satisfied

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Journal Entry // June 7, 2021

All the toil of man is for his mouth, yet his appetite is not satisfied.

Ecclesiastes 6:7 ESV

Satisfaction… How is it that my toiling and striving and labor results in dissatisfaction? This statement and discussion by the Preacher is entirely spot on with how I have felt about my life over the last many years. I have had this insatiable lust and desire prevalent in my every moment that will not allow me to enjoy the good things of this life. There has been a continual unhappiness with my present state at every point of life.

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Unreasoning Animals

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Journal Entry // December 4, 2022

But these people blaspheme all that they do not understand, and they are destroyed by all that they, like unreasoning animals, understand instinctively. (ESV)

Jude 10

This passage in Jude always catches my attention when it comes along in my yearly reading plan. I say that, because I don’t remember hearing any preaching/teaching on this passage or the letter of Jude very often. Even though this letter is only 25 verses there is a lot of helpful and challenging rebukes and exhortations. This one in verse 10 always makes me stop and contemplate how I, like the ungodly, am behaving and living as an unreasoning animal. It’s a vivid picture of a life based on basic instincts and feelings flowing out of a heart that is devoid of understanding the truth of God’s word. A life that blasphemes, belittles, or marginalizes the truth of God’s word and commandments. Like a wild animal, the person Jude is describing lives their life based solely on their feelings and their own understanding.  They may even have a basic knowledge of God’s word that shapes their own personal level of morality, but it is not rooted and informed by the gospel. It is processed and filtered through their own instinctual and emotional internal systems that distort God’s truth into their own individual personal version of truth and morality. Seemingly living their life as their own master and god.

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Jealous Pride

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Journal Entry // December 2, 2022

But Queen Vashti refused to come at the king’s command delivered by the eunuchs. At this the king became enraged, and his anger burned within him. (ESV)

Esther 1:12

Reading the beginning of the story of Esther, we see the actions of king Ahasuerus set the stage for the focus of what is to come in the story and how this one incident leads to a sweeping change throughout the king’s land that brings pain, suffering, and death. It all begins with a small statement by the author that the king’s heart was merry with wine. I don’t know if it means he was drunk or just that he had lost some of his inhibitions through drinking. Whatever mental and physical state he was in, he decided to make his wife, the queen, an object for the viewing pleasure of his guests. There is this sense that the king wanted these men to be jealous of his beautiful queen as they lusted after her in front of him. So when the queen refuses, the king is moved from a place of superiority to these princes to one of embarrassment. And in his embarrassment, he becomes enraged with a burning anger. An anger fueled by the loss of his inhibitions and the rationality of a sober mind.

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First Loved

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Journal Entry // November 24, 2022

We love because he first loved us. (ESV)

1 John 4:19

The foundation of all that I truly am is found in these seven words. Because Jesus loves me, I can love others. Because Jesus loves me, I can love Him. The implication from these seven words is that without Him first loving me, I am unable to love Jesus or others. My heart was initially dead and hard as stone; unable to truly love anyone other than myself. But God changed all of that with the perfect satisfying love of Jesus. Jesus chose to love me. He chose to love me not because of what I had done or what I would one day do. No, despite my hard and stubborn heart toward his righteous law and commandments, Jesus laid his full attention on me and chose to let the object of his love be directed upon me. A rebellious sinner. He first loved me.

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A True Heart

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Journal Entry // November 12, 2022

let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water. (ESV)

Hebrews 10:22

It is always interesting to see the pattern of phrases that God brings to my attention during these times of meditation and thought. This morning I sit and consider the words of Christ calling me to draw near to him. It is an important and essential part of following Christ, yet I find it challenging to draw near. Not because I don’t want to draw near but that I am too prideful and arrogant. Yesterday in Hebrews 7, I read that I was to draw near to God through Jesus as he continually prays for me. Now I read that I am to draw near with “a true heart in full assurance of faith.” Looking at the study notes in my Bible, it tells me that a true heart is one that has been cleansed and is in full submission to God. This is just another way of saying that I am to draw near to God through Christ in humility. That I am to rid myself of all the pride and arrogance that seeks to assert itself in my life and I am to clothe myself in humble submissiveness that brings my heart before the throne of grace and mercy.

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Established and Firm

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Journal Entry // November 05, 2022

When the rule of Rehoboam was established and he was strong, he abandoned the law of the LORD, and all Israel with him. (ESV)

2 Chronicles 12:1

With my own eyes I can look around at all the many blessings that the Lord has graciously provided and given to me out of his generous heart and see only my own strength and understanding being the source. In my self-righteousness and pride, I take what has been freely given to me through the hand of God and convince myself and others that it is by my own hand that all these good things have come to pass. I slowly move from a heart filled with gratitude and thankfulness to the One who provides to a heart devoid of thanksgiving and replace it with only arrogance and self-adulation. And as my heart begins to turn inward and my world begins to center solely on myself, I end up in the same place as Rehoboam does. For once Rehoboam had received the kingdom and his rule had been established, he did not rejoice and bask in the mighty works of God. No, he abandoned the law of the Lord. Rehoboam walked away from the One who had given him the promise and fulfilled this same promise. Rehoboam moved from trusting God to trusting in himself.

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