Journal Entry // November 11, 2021
Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”Hebrews 13:5 ESV
Be content… This is the life lesson that God has been teaching me these last couple of years. Well, at least one of the lessons. An important lesson that I have struggled to grasp hold of in a deep meaningful way. I can look back over the last ten years of life and see how discontented I truly was with everything. I can now see how the love of money was quietly weaving itself into my everyday thoughts. I can see a bit more clearly how I was living a double minded life. Trying to serve Christ as best I could, but also wanting the things of this world.
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Journal Entry // January 24, 2021
But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the LORD, because he has dealt bountifully with me.Psalm 13:5-6 ESV
Remember… Remember all that the Lord has done for me. Remember his steadfast love. Remember his salvation. Remember how bountiful his dealing with me has been. These are the keys to the sorrow in my heart and the grayness in my soul. These feelings tell me that God is far from me and has forgotten me and is hiding his face from me. But these feelings lie to me. My flesh tells me these lies to draw my heart away from Christ. To keep my sorrow and worry in the forefront of my eye’s perception and my heart’s understanding.
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But godliness with contentment is great gain,  for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world.1 Timothy 6:6-7 ESV
Godly contentment. I have found it difficult this week to have godly contentment in my life. I have been assaulted with so many different thoughts, emotions, and feelings that are weighing me down. Although this weight is in my mind I can feel it affecting every area of my life. My heart, mind, soul, and strength have all been greatly affected by this continual wave of fear and guilt. So once again, God’s word speaks directly into my immediate need of the moment.
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