And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together.
Colossians 1:17 (ESV)
I have been thinking a lot about my recent past and have seen myself delve into a low depressive valley. It has taken me quite a while to truly understand I was actually in this valley and it is taking just as long for me to understand and discern the pathway out. I find myself in this valley more often than I would expect. So often, I consider this a persistent depressive state. As I have been looking for consistent markers of my time in this valley, I see the commonality of self-centeredness. I find that my spiraling thoughts become so entangled with myself that I can only ever think about the negative aspects of my life. I lose all perspective and simply focus on my self-interests. This verse calls me out of this myopic view of life and lifts me into the heavenly place where Christ is seated at the right hand of the Father. The verse reminds me that everything, not just some things, is held together by the One who is before all things. Jesus reigns supreme before all things and all things have their meaning in him alone.
My circular irrational thoughts that lead me into that depressive valley too easily forget this singular verse. It is vitally important that I remember that Jesus is before all things. That the supremacy of Christ is first and foremost. My irrational self-centered thoughts will try to convince me that I am the most important but this is simply not true. Jesus is the primacy of all things. He is before all things. Do I really truly believe this? In my head and heart, I know this is true without a doubt. In my actions and thoughts, I find myself doubting and forgetting this truth. I find myself believing that I can, need, and should take control of my life and all that surrounds me. I find myself turning to my own personal wisdom and experience over and above the One who is before all things. I find that I often give practical supremacy to myself rather than Jesus.
Jesus in his supremacy holds all things together. It’s not that he just keeps everything going, but that he actually is holding life and creation together. There is not one stray atom in all of the universe. Think about that for a minute. All things find their purpose and meaning in Jesus as they are held together “in” him. From the sun in our sky to the most remote distant star that humans have never glimpsed, these all find their meaning and purpose in him.
So why do I worry and fret about this fragile life? Why do I struggle and worry about so many things, when there is only ever one thing of importance? Paul is here encouraging me to find my meaning and purpose in Christ alone. Just like all things, I too am held together in Jesus. This is my joy and comfort. There is no true joy in the things of this world. Not in houses, cars, bank accounts, influence, recognition, jobs, or even abilities. The key is to realize that my joy is in the One who is before all things and who holds all things together. When I come to that understanding, I will find rest and peace in the supremacy of Jesus. I will stop striving to make something of myself and begin striving to make more of Christ every day.