Journal Entry // April 4, 2021
May my meditation be pleasing to him, for I rejoice in the LORD.Psalm 104:34 ESV
I have never really asked myself this question and have never been so confident as to just announce that the Lord is pleased with my meditation. It sounds prideful and arrogant to declare that the Lord is pleased with your meditation, yet here the Psalmist proclaims that the Lord is pleased.
Even more I am hesitant to truly believe that the Lord is pleased with my meditation. I know my own heart a little better now and I see and feel the darkness within. I know that my heart is easily distracted, easily enticed, and easily led astray. I know that I can simply make my meditation more about me than about the Lord. I can take the good things that God teaches me in these moments and build myself up before others. I can share what I am learning in these private moments, not for the edification of others or the glorification of God, but simply to build up my self-esteem. To make myself sound smart or humble or spiritual. This darkness in my heart tempts me toward self righteousness. My flesh pushes me toward pride.
But these meditations counter all of that. When I come to the Lord in the morning with a humble heart ready and willing to learn and change, the Lord is pleased. He enlightens my heart and brings those hidden sins and desires into the light of his presence, so that they remain hidden no longer. He humbles me. He reveals my weakness. Then… He shows me Jesus. He shows me my risen savior who humbled himself by being made as a man and becoming obedient to death. He gave up his rights and privileges to take upon himself all of my sin and shame. Why? He is pleased to be in relationship with me. My meditation is a means of deepening and strengthening my heart to his. My meditation engages my heart and the Spirit of the Lord living within.
My meditation is a time to Read, Reflect, and Repent. This pleases the Lord. A humble obedient heart that seeks to love the Lord. I don’t do this perfectly, but he’s not seeking perfection. It is good to remember the mindset of Christ that Paul encourages us have through Philippians 2:5-11. When I am tempted to pride, I should meditate on Christ’s humility. When I am tempted to wander, I should focus on Christ’s obedience. When I am tempted to despair, I should remember that Jesus reigns forever. This is my glorious Savior that accomplished it all to be in relationship with me. He invited me to come to him in my current state and seek his mercy and grace and he showers me with love and goodness. He is worthy to receive all power, glory, and honor.