Journal Entry // May 31, 2021
Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered.Proverbs 28:26 ESV
This statement in Proverbs cut me deeply this morning. There have been several good passages this past week that pricked my heart, but I was not faithful in my reflections and meditating so they did not get captured. There is this tendency in my heart to trust my mind. I find it rather easy to contemplate and think deeply about my desires and I am learning that my mind is both deceptive and easily deceived.
My mind has an ability to take good and righteous thoughts and slowly turn them over and overlooking for cracks in the wall that can be exploited. Weaknesses in my understanding of God’s truth where the deceptiveness of sin can slip into my mindset and taint my thinking and understanding. And because I naturally trust my own mind and thoughts and logic. Because I can so easily allow myself to be deceived by myself, I fall into the snare of the enemy. Over and over again. It happens each and every day.
I struggle to walk in wisdom. Why? Because the way of wisdom is difficult. The way of wisdom is the fear of the Lord. The way of wisdom is a path filled with humility. It is a life of transparency before the Lord and myself.
“Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.” Proverbs 28:13 ESV
This is wisdom… This is humility… This is life as it’s meant to be lived. My mind tells me to hide and conceal my transgressions, but wisdom implores me to cast them all before the feet of Jesus in humility. The mercy and grace of God is so unnatural to my rational thinking. How can the mercy and grace of God continue to cover all of my sin and guilt and shame? It feels as though I continue to be a burden to my Savior. I feel as though he should give up on me by now. My mind lies to me.
God’s word tells me a different story. It tells me of a humble loving Savior that took upon himself ALL my sin and guilt upon the cross and paid for it all. Every ounce of my sin has been covered by the perfect sacrifice of Christ. There is nothing hidden deep within that is not covered by his holy blood. As he told the disciples during the last Passover, their bodies have been cleansed and only their feet need to be washed.
I too have been cleansed by the righteous holy blood of Christ’s sacrifice. This body of sin has been cleansed and made new. But my feet get filthy as I walk through this world. I need to humbly come before Jesus each and every day (moment) and have my feet washed fresh. I need my heart, my soul, my mind, and my strength all renewed and refreshed each and every day. This is wisdom. Understanding my weakness. Understanding that the world will cling to me as dirt does to my feet. But there is a fountain flowing with living water that cleans me. There is a Savior that loves me and makes his home within me. He is the one I can trust and hold onto.