Hopeful Waiting

Journal Entry // February 13, 2021

And now, O Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in you.

Psalm 39:7 ESV

And what is this hope that David is waiting on? It is not the type of hope that we use in our modern day vernacular. It is not this wishful hope that we have no idea if it will come to pass. It is not hoping that I win the lottery or hoping that it doesn’t rain next weekend. No, this hope in the Lord is a surety that what God has promised will come to pass. That even in the darkest of moments when it looks like his promise is failing, we can trust that the Lord will surely bring about what he has promised.

And what is this hope? Hope cannot be just a phantom hope or hope for hope’s sake or your hope is in nothing. Hope has to have an object and that object is God himself and his redemption of my soul. This hope is in the promise that Jesus has paid the penalty for all my sins (past, present, future) and I am redeemed as an adopted heir. That this world is not my home and that the Lord is working in my life and journey to lead me to himself and into the rest of his presence.

This is my hope… This life is a journey, a pilgrimage, a sojourning that is important but it’s not the ending. Life is not meaningless as I wait upon the Lord. This life and journey is important because God has called me to walk this path. My path is designed just for me and it’s unique. God has me on this path by his good mercy and grace. I want to honor him on this journey and give him glory through my actions. I don’t want to get distracted by the things of this world, even good things that God brings.

I don’t want the things of this world to distract me from loving Christ with all my being. I want to live and participate in this world for the glory of Christ. It is difficult to not let my selfish pride take charge. My selfishness is always scheming to find ways of personal enjoyment and pleasure with no regard for loving Christ. My flesh will give impulses that mimic righteousness but are laced with the pain of sin.

So, I must stand firm. I must continually search my heart for sin and confess to the Lord at all times. There is no shame in confession. Confession truly is the heartbeat of intimacy with Christ. He is gentle and lowly. He wants me to come before him in humility and express my need of forgiveness. He is quick to forgive. He will always console and give comfort. Like the father with two sons (one left and one stayed) he loves all his children and runs to them when they call. Whether we run far away from him or whether we run from him but stay close. He is faithful to forgive.

So, I wait patiently on the Lord. Not for a new house or a new car or friends or influence. I wait patiently with hope. Hope in the calling of God to lead me home. Home to where he is in heaven. Home to where I truly belong. Home to my Savior. Home to my God.