Gentle Trust

Journal Entry // August 9, 2022

But if he says, ‘I have no pleasure in you,’ behold, here I am, let him do to me what seems good to him.” (ESV)

2 Samuel 15:26

This is a moving picture of faith and trust in the providence and grace of God moving in the life of David. It’s difficult to really see the rationale for David fleeing Absalom and departing the city, but I understand his desire to not engage in conflict with his son. What I do understand in this passage is that David’s heart is bent on serving the Lord as best he can. David is making decisions based on how best to honor the Lord and be obedient to his calling and God’s Word. Throughout this chapter of his preparation to leave, you can see the care and love he has for all those in his household and the sadness he has in knowing all the hardships they will suffer alongside him on this journey. Yet with all of this on his mind, David simply cares to be obedient and humble before the Lord. He wants to follow the path laid out before him in humble acceptance of God’s good mercy to him. Whether it be for his benefit or not, David simply wants the Lord to do, “what seems good to him.”

This needs to be my mantra as well. The forefront of my mind needs to be a humble obedient reliance upon the Lord that simply trusts in the goodness of my holy Father. A hope and understanding that the goodness of God will do to me what is best in the eyes of the Lord. That may be a life filled with suffering or hurt or pain or mistreatment or humiliation, but it is of little matter if it is the holy path of righteousness laid out before me. My response should be the same as David’s. A humble acceptance that the Lord is my master and I will follow where he leads.

This is true freedom. Freedom from the toil and snares of the world that continually push me to conform. The world wants me to assert my rights, to remind everyone that this is all about me. The world would say that David should have raised up his army and fought to the death against Absalom in order to keep his place as king. The world wants me to make that same mistake. The world wants me to believe that I am the center of everything. That everyone has it out for me in some sense and that I should not trust or believe anything anyone else says. That I should believe the worst in people. The world wants me angry and defiant all the time.

The Lord wants me humble and meek and full of grace and mercy. The Lord wants me to understand my own weakness and remember the weakness of others. The Lord wants me to care for others even if to my detriment. In this passage, David is demonstrating love for Absalom. He loves Absalom so much that he would rather be homeless and running for his life than inflict any amount of harm on him. David chooses to be humble. David chooses to hope. I need this. I need this daily. I need to fully trust in the grace of God working in my heart. Has someone done me wrong? Forgive and show kindness. The Lord has called me to a life that emulates the life of Christ and that life he demonstrated was a heart of gentle lowliness. Humble to the end…

Lord Jesus. Thank you for the grace and mercy you have shown me and continue to show me in this life. I am a man that continues to fail you in so many ways. I am prideful and arrogant. I am self-serving and boastful. I want, so I take. Forgive me Lord. Forgive me when I fail to emulate the goodness and humility of Christ. Cover this weak man with your grace and mercy. Fill me with your Spirit and led me in your love. Continue to teach me humility. Lord, I can feel my heart changing and growing in this area. I can see Jesus wringing out the pride and boasting that still resides there. Lord, draw out that poison from my heart and fill me with your love and mercy. Let me, like David, be sensitive to your ways and humbly rely on your goodness. You care for me. You love me. You have given me so much. Much more than I can ever think or imagine. Open my eyes today to see your glory around me. Let me see Jesus at every step.

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